4 YEARS AND A LIFETIME TO GO

I take this time, to reflect not of the road ahead of me one possibly littered with IEDs, VBIEDs, snipers, and untold as of yet unseen dangers.  I take this time to offer my renewed faith, not in our cause here, but of my faith in my love for the most wonderful woman I have ever known.  My best friend, my truest love, my wife.

This day four years ago, we had our first date.  Looking back it wasn't much, some awkward conversation, a couple of tacos, and to me not a premonition but a determination to spend the rest of my life with this wonderfully shy, and beautiful woman.  I was certain nearly from the beginning when I first laid eyes on this woman, who I now call "my angel" that it was to be her.   It seems that almost every  important hallmark in our relationship thus far save for our wedding I have been away.  We were married two years ago in November.  On her 30th birthday I was at Officer Candidate School.  Our first anniversary I was away, preparing to be here.  On this date which marks the fourth year of our time together I am away.  I'll miss her birthday again this year, and our second anniversary I'll be 10,000 miles away from the one person who means more to me than my own life.  I never really understood what love truly is until I met her.  These last few days have been emotionally trying, we have had to endure heart breaking disappointment and intense emotional assaults; and have had to do so so far apart.  Words over the telephone and emails of support are a sorry substitute for being able to hold my angel.  My hands shake as I write this, because my heart is heavy with longing on this day.  I know my duty and continue to discharge said duty, but today my heart just isn't in it. 

6 months two days, and 16 hours this minute and I'll be closer to home.  about 9.5 thousand miles to be exact.  So much time to make up, when I get back, so much to do.  An entire year will be missing from my marriage, and I don't know how to get that back.  There will be challenges aside from having to get to know each other all over again.  There is significant resistance from family to our relationship, that must be overcome.  A campaign to run, moving into a new home, and rebuilding a life that was put on hold.  Not just mine, not just hers but "ours" as a couple.  There was a movie that I saw as a child called "The Best Years of Our Lives" about soldiers returning from WWII, and the challenges they faced upon return.  I remember a quote that has always stuck with me, a husband said of his wife; "I have had to fall in love with my wife all over again." 

This war has offered me communication that was undreamed of in the 1940's, so I get to hear her voice almost daily, I get to read her words nearly daily, I get to see her face in near real time weekly.  It has been two and a half months since I saw her last.  It will be 6 months two days, and 16 hours this minute and about 9.5 thousand miles until I get to hold her again and start making up for lost time.  I can't say with certainty I understand everything about Iraq.  But what I do know is that everyday I survive this war is a day closer to home, and the woman I love.  Every single day here is a fight, and we are very much in a war.  At the end of this all I'll be able to say is "I was there."  At the end of this, when I look into my wife's eyes she won't care about the war, the insurgency, or the United States Army.  All that will matter is we are again together and after a year, we are again whole. 

Happy anniversary angel, I will do everything I can to return to you...I love you endlessly.

Rusten

Oh, for those of you who haven't heard this song...it was written by a fellow soldier from the 1st BN 153rd Infantry Arkansas National Guard.  Fellow goes by the handle JR.  This is a link to a previous post, forgive the crude language.  Download the song it is worth it.

The Picture is the 100 roses I sent to my wife for our 4 year anniversary

Comments

[Al's Girl]

I know this year apart is very difficult (trust me - I'm living it first hand) - but the things that you guys do to keep your relationship alive now will really help in the long run. Sending you many blessings for your special anniversary. And lots of wishes for a lifetime of happiness for you and your wife.

[Kelley]

Haven't seen anything from you in a bit..... post and let us know you are alive and well.....

[devildog6771]

Poem is on its way!

[Rick OBrien]

Thank God for you, and your lovely wife.
God bless you for your work, and sacrifice on OUR behalf here, back at home.
Keep your head down, and stay alert.
You and your wife...ALL of you and your families...are in my prayers tonight...and everynight that I pray.
Thank you for your sacrifice and service.

[baldilocks]

You go, boy!

I continue to keep you and your lovely wife in my prayers.

[EJM]

You are both incredibly lucky to have each other and a love strong enough to endure the separation. You will see how much more in love you will be when you get home safe and sound. My gift wish for you both is to be stateside for years to come and to grow and nuture this relationship so it never ever fades away.

[beth]

Russ - that was incredibly beautiful. DJ is a lucky lady. We are all proud of all of you.
Beth

[membrain]

I want to offer thanks for your sacrifice from Canada. You expressed your love for your wife very poignantly. You also made clear your intention to serve and for that I thank you as this war you fight is part of a global war. You serve us all. Godspeed.

[Toni]

Wow. I'm jealous. Isn't that terrible considering all of the adversity you both have endured in your 4 yrs together. Wishing you many years for the future.

[flythemig29]

You are the man! This is my third deployment and I have been in theater since 2003. I bow to you and the way you express what all of us feel about our loved ones. We feel it but just do a poor job of expressing it. Maybe it is because of the Army machismo culture, maybe it is because we just don't know how. What ever the reason, you are showing us that you can be a warrior, a man, and sensitive, all at once. Keep it up! Hooah

[Kat]

awww..this is so sweet. Congrats on your four-year anniversary. :-) Y'all are inmy prayers!

[Tina]

It is so wonderful to see you expressing such emotional sentiment. Luther says you have joined the ranks of mushy shmucks but that is how marriage is supposed to be. Don't worry, he is very guilty of it himself! Knowing you and DJ you will accomplish what few in our generation do, sustaining a loving and lifelong union of blissful marriage! Despite all odds you two have passion for each other and for your commitment. Here is to many more celebrations to come !
Cheers!

[susan]

Sentimental fool that I am, I can't help but cry whenever I hear such real-life romantic love stories.

[Rosemary]

You are definitely an Officer and a gentleman. You are also romantic. This is very bittersweet.

Something to look forward to, next year, she will be with you on the campaign trail!

[DJ]

Thank you, my love, for expressing to the world this bittersweet day we celebrate today. Four years ago I let you kiss me and I only long to let you do it again. Love, D

[AFSister]

Currie! That's awesome! I love the roses, but even more, I love how sentimental you are towards your wife. What a lucky, lucky, LUCKY lady. We should all be so lucky to have a man who remembers the anniversary of our first date.

You never cease to amaze me, you know that? Congratulations.

[74]

I too, almost immediately knew that was the woman I wanted to spend my life with. 30 years now, and still going strong. May you both be as lucky as the two of us.

[Todd A Moffatt]

LT

I CAN'T SAY I FEEL YOUR PAIN, BUT IT DOES SHOW IN YOUR WORDS. I THINK THE LOVE YOU HAVE IS PARTLY RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR AMAZING RESOLVE. I WOULD BE HONORED IF I COULD SOMEHOW HELP YOU WITH YOUR CAMPAIGN. I RESIDE IN THE OC
PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT I COULD DO...

TODD

[devildog6771]

Rustin, I think I misunderstood. Is this the anniversary of when you met, when you married, or both? In any event, congratulations.

I wrote a poem for Thunder6's anniversary. Don't know if he saw it. But if you tell me which you're celebrating, I'll write one for you too. I won't say I'm great, just that they are from the heart! [lol]

I'll continue my prayers for you and your wife for your safe return. God Bless.

[LotharBot]

100 roses?

My 3-year wedding anniversary is coming up next week... thanks for the idea!

[ac]

I hope for you and you wife, many happy years to make up for this one.