Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum

Journey's End

       December 15^th 2005, was one of the greatest days of my life, I was witness to the birth of democracy in Iraq.  It is a rarity to be a part of such an historic event. Despite any and all arguments about the why we are here; by some accounts 75% of Iraqis registered to vote did so (Imagine who or groups of who, would not be in office if 75% of American voters turned out!). Despite threats (very real threats) of violence Iraqi men and women lined up and waited; some for hours, to vote. They waited patiently in lines that would have driven me mad! They have never before had such an opportunity to vote and have a say in their own nation. While none of these candidates (nearly 8000 of them), will share the overwhelming 99.9% landslide victory Saddam Hussein (Former dictator, tyrant, and poet) once enjoyed. The day passed without incident, save for the aforementioned self-determination of the nation by its citizens. All was quiet on virtually all fronts of the war in Iraq.  In fact, I can honestly say I was bored. Being bored in war is a good thing, and as of late, I have been blissfully bored to no end. Which is why I have not posted for some time, I simply had nothing to say.

 

Our battalion awards ceremony was on the 17^th and I am now, at long last a 1^st Lieutenant. Odd, I never imagined I’d ever be a 1LT, and now like some magic wand was waived the often comical look of confusion that plagues most Second Lieutenants is gone from my face. In its place is a grimace of a combat veteran, a sort of permanent scowl with my cover pulled down over my eyes and a frown etched on my face I move about the base walking briskly and as of late avoiding most unnecessary conversation. I have not been in a particularly bad mood, but save for time left here in Iraq, the mind has distanced itself from much around me. Funny, I don’t feel any different. It was a great moment in my life. I stood with 2 other officers and we were promoted together. Our battalion commander asked us to address the battalion and I was caught so off guard by it I couldn’t think of a thing to say; oh, and the microphone wouldn’t bend down so I had to stand on my toes to speak clearly into it. It reminded me of my speech for Student Council back in 1985. All I could think to say was that we’d seen our last full moon in Iraq.  I hope that is true. At the ceremony promotions and medals were awarded for our time here and for some very courageous young men, the medals were well deserved. For others…well perhaps another time.

Looking back at the last year, I remember so much and so many people I have met, and had the honor of serving with. I have seen some wonderful things here and I have seen some of the worst violence, and the darkness of the human soul. I have seen vicious acts of hatred, and I have seen selflessness I never thought possible. This war is different from other wars…This war is exactly the same as every other war. War devours everything in its path; there is no mercy to it. There is no reason in it, it exists to destroy, and as long as there are governments run by mortals there will always be war. Yet, even in war the brighter side of humanity can shine through, I have seen it. Average Iraqis handing me a bottle of cold water in the blistering heat, a little girl holding the hand of a grieving soldier whose friend had been mortally wounded in an IED attack. Defiant Iraqi civilians standing in line to vote, so that their voice is heard.

 

         How do I explain this place to those who will not listen, we are winning here. Of that, there is no doubt. The cost is high, but as Heinlein asserts; “Something given has no value.” A free Iraq has cost us more than I ever wanted to spend, in time, lives, friends and blood. For the soldier there is no politics (at least there shouldn’t be) for the soldier if there is to be war, then we destroy the enemies of our nation. War, as horrific as it is, is simple. Everything else is hard.

           I have been afforded the honor of being an Army officer in time of war, and I have served with the very best that our nation has to offer. When this is over and I move on to other things, it will be from this perspective that I move forward. Simplicity, Occam’s razor suggests we not add anything unnecessary to a problem to solve it. In short keep it simple, when you find a problem fix it. I will miss the men I have served with here, when you spend nearly 16 hours a day with the same people every day for 18 months, like them or not they become family. I see that now, again perspective, and a healthy amount of time spent apologizing to myself for being such a miserable SOB at times in my life. A healthy amount of time spent reaching out to old friends I’d slighted years and years ago, and saying I’m sorry. A healthy amount of time spent not talking but listening, and I mean really listening to what people had to say. I have met some great people through emails and in meeting them; I have been presented with some great opportunities for life after “this war”. Like I said 11 months ago, there are only two days here, the day you arrive and the day you leave (yes like prison). Soon it will be tomorrow and I will leave. Not that this hasn’t just been a blast (often quite literally), but I’ll be glad to kick the dust of Southern Baghdad from my boots and focus on tomorrow, walk my dog, and hug my wife, and move past the only life I have known for nearly a year. Soon I’ll be whole again.

 

      I am not certain if I’ll post again, not being dramatic but this blog (in its current form) has nearly run its course. I would like to thank everyone who has written me, even those who attacked me and lashed out with anger and at times apparent insanity. Interesting at times, and often down right hilarious. Those of you who sent me comfort items thank you so very much, your kindness and consideration truly lifted my spirits (AFSister!!) Those of you who shared pictures of your families, and children I appreciate your sharing what “normal” is with me. Those of you who think of me as a friend, I am always an email away. Those of you who thanked me for doing my job, well again all I can say is that sometimes the extent of my patriotism was putting my boots on, especially when I didn’t want to. So, I humbly thank you for reaching out to me and expressing your gratitude, thank you, thank you, thank you! Those of you who engaged in healthy and heated debate with me over our different political views, I thank you as well, soon we’ll see one way or the other won’t we. Those of you who continue to question this war, and why we are here, good for you, without different opinions, there is no debate. Without debate and open discussion, our perspective is skewed and we can ill afford to lose anymore of who we are because of a lack of perspective. Seek reason, find common ground, and never be afraid to stand up for what is right. 

 

Finally, to my wife. My angel, my best friend and my compass. It has been so long since I watched you drive away from the Airport on April 21^st 2005. It has been so long since my cheeks were stained with tears as I watched you pull away and felt as if I’d just died. At times, I thought it was the last time I’d ever see you, and at that thought my heart grew cold. We have been apart for 9 months now, and soon we will be together again, the one and only wish I have had since I saw you last was that I could see you again. To see you smile at me is the best present I could ever hope for, it is in fact the only thing I have let myself hope for, for months now. When this is over and I hang this faded uniform I hope to spend the rest of my life with you and when we grow old together, and reflect on this war and our time apart as with soldiers in all wars I’ll be able to smile and say; “I was there…”

 

What will I miss about Iraq? Nothing…everything.

 Until the next…

RDC

 

 

CHRISTMAS IF YOU CAN KEEP IT

The words drifted across the frozen battlefield: 'Stille Nacht. Heilige Nacht. Alles Schlaft, einsam wacht'. To the ears of the British troops peering over their trench, the lyrics may have been unfamiliar but the haunting tune was unmistakable. After the last note a lone German   infantryman appeared holding a small tree glowing with light. 'Merry Christmas. We not shoot, you not shoot.'
It was just after dawn on a bitingly cold Christmas Day in 1914, 90 years ago on Saturday, and one of the most extraordinary incidents of the Great War was about to unfold.

Weary men climbed hesitantly at first out of trenches and stumbled into no   man's land. They shook hands, sang carols, lit each other's cigarettes, swapped tunic buttons and addresses and, most famously, played football, kicking around empty bully-beef cans and using their caps or steel helmets
as goalposts. The unauthorised Christmas truce spread across much of the   500-mile Western Front where more than a million men were encamped.

 

What is the point of that? Dear friends allow me this rant, and read on.

 

That was over 80 years ago.  Men, who were enemies at war killing one another by the thousands, stopped fighting and crossed the field of battle to celebrate Christmas. CHRISTMAS, the celebration of Jesus Christ, you remember him, the man upon which the entire Christian faith is based (Christianity, by the way is the main religion of the United States). The man who was sent down from heaven to die for our sins. As I have said in the past I am not an overly religious man. I am among the worst Catholics in the world, I look at my watch during mass, and grow restless when it goes past the 42.5 minutes I am accustomed to. I haven’t been to mass since I left home, I use the war as my excuse, yet I know in my mind it really is no excuse. Yet now I see in the “news” that there is an attack on Christmas at home. Some people are offended by it. Let me get this correct; the rationale is that it is a religious holiday and it may be deemed offensive to some. Am I correct?  The United States  is a nation founded on the Judeo Christian belief system. So, exactly whom is it offending?

 

If you are offended by MILLIONS of Americans annually feeling good about themselves, and spending time with family, spreading cheer, and oh yeah, remembering God I have issue with that. If stores are so concerned with offending people that they are removing any mention of a holiday that American’s have celebrated since before these United States even existed then I hope their December sales tank.

 

I have never been a fan of December and the holidays, I used to think the sentiment far too commercial, and phony. Yet here in “this war” I see wreaths adorning the doors in our building, I see a Christmas tree in nearly every office. Our Muslim hosts say merry Christmas to us as they pass us in the streets. Yet at home, during one of the most joyous times of the year, people are attacking one of the holiest holidays of the Christian calendar. I am offended and angry. We take God from our schools, granted religion in public school should be limited, but it never hurt. We remove God, from every aspect of public life, and we wonder why children go into schools with guns, we wonder why families are disintegrating, we wonder why the moral fiber that binds our great nation is crumbling.  I think if you turn your back on lets say a friend, why then would you be angry when he returns the favor.  And lets say for arguments sake there is a God, do you really want the big guy feeling slighted? 

 

The United States is the most accepting and tolerant nation on Earth, and we are letting the few dictate terms to the many. I say stop the madness! We celebrate Hanukkah with our Jewish American families, we celebrate Ramadan with our Muslim families, we accept Kwanza and embrace it with our African American familes, yet now we are standing idly by while Christmas is attacked. I think NOT! I still feel joy on Christmas eve, when I wrap my last minute gifts for my wife. Who by the way is a Jew. We celebrate both holidays. If we are such a liberal and accepting society, then how is it that we are allowing the few to attack a holiday that the many embrace?

 

I remember when I was a child, the insane excitement I felt during Christmas break (oh, is it Winter Break now?) I knew that soon, I'd be able to TRASH the living room and dance about in my arsenal of new toys; you see I was an only child for many many years, and knew that the family would spoil me to no end. I was on my best behavior the quarter prior to Christmas. I’d read the WSJ, to know if consumer confidence was high or low, then I’d make my Christmas list and leave discreet hints about the house. Asking Mother what Santa’s address was. Checking the WSJ, and checking it again. I learned early on that consumer confidence in Q1 was important to the holiday season. I didn’t know why, but it didn’t matter. CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS… Oh, sorry did I offend? Me thinks thou doth protest too much!

 

It is the holiday season, that means Christmas, that means Hanukkah, that means Kwanza, and above all else that means LIGHTEN UP!

 

I think that there needs to be a 5^th Freedom, an amendment to FDRs 4 Freedoms. The 5^th Freedom should be Freedom from the sniveling of selfish, miserable, mean, and unhappy people. Everywhere in the world.

 

“I’ll be home for Christmas…if only in my dreams…”

 

Happy Holidays…

RDC